It's official; after a long 2 months, I'm outta my terrible mood swings.

I think the main reason for this change is 'cos I've recognized and accepted the fact that I have been empowering my affection for Elena to affect my moods, and I have been trying, slowly but steadily, to break that stimulus and to live happily. Yes, emotional tiredness still sinks in occasionally, but I think I'm handling them quite well these days.

Yes, I still do fantasize being in a relationship with Elena (speaking of which, recently, I have no idea why the image of Elena, with her long silky hair bundled up and held in place with a hair clip, in tees and shorts, popped into my mind; and merely describing her in that as beautiful is not doing her justice.)

Oops, sorry, side-tracked to much. Anyway, I do have those fantasies, and every time when I pass by her desk, I always thought I'm seeing an angel.... (okay, that's mushy....) Whatever the case, I must say I'm not attracted to her physically (not merely, that is, 'cos after all, to me, she's the most beautiful); I kinda am discovering a little of her character every time when I'm having lunch with Francisca (nope, she didn't tip me off with these information; these "little revelations" were made during our wide array of topics we shared.) Anyway, as I "discover" her traits, I noticed that her personality does not differ much from my initial assessments. Haha, I'm not saying I'm good at assessing people, just that I'm glad I'm not too way off.

Yes, quite a number of people have told me that I'm crazy to have kinda "committed" to a non-existent relationship, but somehow, I just have a strong feeling that she is the one (sorry, Neo). Yes, I'm fully aware that every time when I fall in love, I have that feeling, but hey, wouldn't that be a commendable factor prior starting one?

Just give me your blessings, ya? :)