I was so drowned in my thoughts that I gave up jogging after hitting the turning point.

Prior making my way to the gathering place, I went to Elena's division, armed with the excuse of asking Andrew whether he would be joining the jogging session, in hope to catch a glimpse of Elena... When I was 2-3 meters away from her desk, she walked out, apparently making her way home. I wasn't too sure whether she saw me or not, but if my currently confused mind is correct, she did. She turned her back against me, heading for the exit, and I have no idea exactly when, she pressed her ears against her mobile phone. Well, there wasn't anything wrong with what happened, but in the context that she did saw me (I was already in my PT attire), could she be "pretending to make/answer a call", barring me any chance of communication? I don't know and I was (and still am) very confused. My heart sank immediately when I saw her holding mobile phone against her ears.

After a good minute or two had passed, I made my way to the gathering point via the same lift lobby she headed to. I wasn't exactly hoping to see her at the lobby 'cos I think that would make the situation very embarrassing. Well, I didn't..... at least, not while I was waiting for it... (must remember to thank God about this)..... But when I reached the ground floor, I saw her again, a good 5 meters in front of me, heading towards the train station (this time, it was apparent that the "call" had ended.)

My mind was thrown into a state of confusion, and as I jogged, a lot of things went through my mind. "Why?", "Is it meant to be?", and things like that flooded my mind, and soon I gave up jogging, and instead started walking from the turning point. I don't know why, but at that time, I thought I ought to send her an email, and throughout the whole walking session, I kept drafting and reviewing the "email." Initially, I didn't know what to "write", but eventually, when I was back in the office, I continue to draft and review, and finally sent her an email expressing my desire to know her better.

Hey, what the hell? Why do I keep "stabbing" my heart with all these "minor setbacks"? I must really, really put in the effort to entrust this into God hands, and if it is one relationship meant to blossom, in His good time, He will make it blossom. What's impossible to man is possible with God...

Argh!!!!! God, give me the patience to wait upon You. Give me the wisdom to keep myself in tune with You. And most importantly, help me to surrender myself to You. In the Good Shepherd's name.