I know I have already mentioned this for umpteen times, but I shall re-iterate it again.

Somehow, it dawned to me (again) that I ought to leave everything in His hands. Everything, including my love for Elena (okay, love may be too strong a word.) Most likely, this "enlightenment" came after one of my colleagues (whom I shall no reveal the name to protect that person's identity) shared (for umpteen times too) that he/she "will leave things in God's hands" and his/her "feeling of dying to get out of the company due to the company's poor management of resources/staff and poor remuneration."

[Before I'm being accused as a moral bigot, the account that follows recount the incident that led me to the realization that I should leave things in His hands.]

While this colleague of mine (thereafter to be referred to as A) was pouring out her bitterness of the "dire situation" he was in, his friend (thereafter, B) "affirmed" A's sorrows. They kept complaining the pay they are getting are not enough to compensate for the amount of work they are doing. Note that none of them need to work overtime frequently; OT is only an once-in-a-blue-moon thing for them.

"The company still has not contact me with regards to the job interview I went last week. Most likely, it's a goner." A lamented. "I don't want to care about all these anymore. I'll leave everything in God's hands."

"Do you still remember [name suppressed]? He's a little regretful of his decision to have moved to his current company. Nowadays, he has to work till 8pm!" B said.

"My superior knows nothing, has zero experience, and is very illogical in the decisions he make.... Nowadays, I have nothing to do but to surf the net for the whole day! I'll be better off if I'm transferred to another section." A lamented again. "I'm still dying to get out of this company!"

Throughout the whole conversation, they kept lamenting how unfortunate they are currently in their workplace, and never counted their blessings that they are still under employment. Honestly, I was fuming by the time they ended the conversation. Do they know how fortunate they are to be employed?

A has been dying to get out of the company, and he is even willing to accept a job which may have a completely different job scope compared to his current one; B has gained a pay raise after moving to his new workplace, and, as part and parcel of the deal, has more work to do (plus a lousy boss to deal with.)

If my memory serves me well, A has also been telling himself to "submit to His will" with regard to his employment (be it continuing in the current one or, better, a new job), but laments every time why he isn't going anywhere after X years of service in the current company. As for B, I remember very clearly that there was once he mentioned that he regretted trading "his time and not-so-stressful work in his previous company" for the pay he currently getting (and more stressful work, plus an irresponsible superior.)

As I've already mentioned, I'm not trying to be a moral bigot. Somehow, I reflected upon this, and found myself to be in a similar position. I've lamented about my singlehood, and I've also expressed my desire to "leave things in His hands" (okay, I'm too lazy to find the blog entry which I've said that.) I realized I (also) have been merely paying lips service in my submission to God all these while. Not that I want to give a convenient excuse to stop all attempts in courting Elena (for that matter, I still love her.... :p) All these "short bursts" of revelations have never left me an impact big enough in motivating me to submit to Him. I'm hoping that this time won't be the same as the previous ones. After all, if Elena were really to be the one He has prepared, there isn't any reason for me to be so anxious about this relationship, 'cos in time to come, He'll tell me she's the one (or not.)

God ought to be in the picture - the picture of my life....